June 21, 2014

Dealing with Quirks




This video is a sort of comic introduction to one topic in my book, which is that the people that we're around the most can really annoy us. Life at home is like living in a fishbowl; everything is magnified. I

t is easy to be overwhelmed by irritating quirks and weaknesses. Since the people we live with may all have different weaknesses and different ways of communicating, it's quite often easy to feel offended. Sometimes, loved ones just don't think alike. 


How do we move beyond the offense and miscommunication? 


  • Ask ourselves if they really meant to offend us. Was the person, actually, trying to make us angry, or were they acting out of an inability to communicate more clearly?
  • Lighten the mood with humor. My family and I laugh at each other often, not that I appreciate it. I'm a sensitive person.  However, if the only two options are anger and humor, humor is the option that is best for our mental health. Anger is not healthy; it hurts only ourselves. It can build up inside of us and cause all sorts of difficulties. 
  • Take a calming step backwards from anger. I feel that I'm disrespected when my family jokes about my hearing loss, or other weaknesses that I have. Yet, if I try to remain calm, I may be able to look at things from their point of view. 
  • Try to see things from the loved one's point of view. They might not know that what they are doing and saying is annoying or offensive to us. This goes back to the fact that the people we love may not think the same way that we do. That's a difficult lesson that I've had to learn over a lifetime.
  • Allow everyone freedom of expression, within reason. I'm talking about verbal and non-verbal communication. We might not all have the same mannerisms, physical concerns, and quirks in communication.
What sort of quirks do you notice in others? How do you deal with these quirks?