Each of us are faced with choices almost continually, although we may not
realize it. These decisions inevitably lead us to either minor, or major,
victories and defeats. Often, the
difference between success and failure is the refusal to accept setbacks. This can
relate to either outer negativity or pessimistic self-talk.
Would prominent people such as J. K Rowling, Helen Keller, and Florence
Nightingale have left such a legacy for us all if they had allowed themselves
to remain in the darkness? We could certainly forgive them for thinking “I am
too financially insecure and abused” , or “I have too many physical limitations”,
or “ Ladies of good breeding don’t get involved in the marginalized,
lower-class position of nursing.”
I catch myself in negative self-talk almost constantly, especially lately.
There’s a long list of reasons for this. My thought process was so dark that I finally
decided to turn my thought process around. I’ll mention the main method I’m
using for this later in the post. First, I’d like to examine what some experts
say…
What is Self-Talk?
A staff
article at mayoclinic.org
defines it as an endless stream of unspoken thoughts. It can flow from two
different places:
- Logic and reason (positive thoughts)
- Misconceptions created from a lack of information (negative thoughts)
Pessimistic feelings
resulting from fallacies can be divided into four categories:
Filtering—Keeping out the positive reminiscences.
Personalizing—Believing everything is your fault,
or your responsibility.
Catastrophizing—Imagining only the worst-case
scenario.
Polarizing—Taking an “all or nothing” attitude.
(Ignoring the middle ground.)
How do we use Positive Self-Talk?
*An article
by Dharmendra Dubey on positivetrail.com
states that we can succeed in life if we have an optimistic attitude. One way
to accomplish this is to label problems as temporary
setbacks.
The author suggests
using positive self-affirmations:
- “I love life.”
- “I know I can do this.”
- “I like myself.”
- “I will not falter; I am strong and confident.”
- “I am full of health, energy, and vitality.”
*Here is a
practical method I use: I write down constructive thoughts about myself on paper as I speak them aloud softly. (Of
course, I make sure nobody is paying attention to me.) The effect of writing
and speaking at the same time is tremendous. In this manner, three of our
senses are engaged: hearing, sight, and touch. Also, it covers a few methods of
learning. This is important because people have preferred methods of taking in
information.
My Conclusion
Literally,
our thoughts can make us or break us. I’ve
often heard it said we believe our opinion about ourselves more than others’
ideas. That’s why it’s crucial to regularly monitor what’s going on inside
our heads.
Yet, for the
believer, even more important than our feelings is God’s amazingly empowering
thoughts regarding each of us. These are found in the Bible.
How do you
talk to yourself?
