Have you
ever considered how complicated and personal the thinking process is? Some of
us are usually upbeat, while some of us have to struggle to find happiness.
Yet, that’s a simplistic explanation. Perennially positive people should not
discount the fact that hopeful thinking is difficult for some people. It just
is.
Our minds
are not water faucets that we can quickly turn on and off. Our brains are
complicated organisms. Just ask any neuroscientist/neurosurgeon. Life isn’t
always as simple as making a quick choice
and being able to continuously live by it.
Keeping a
positive mindset has become a hot topic in religion and pop culture. Many
famous people are discussing and writing books about it. The experts make it
sound easy. But is it?
Roadblocks to Positive Thinking
I’ll be frank. I have depression, obsessive-compulsive disorder, and general anxiety
disorder. There, I said it. In addition, I found out today that I am seriously
deficient in vitamin D. This is the vitamin that helps to regulate our mood.
Let’s just say that I could sooner stop Niagara Falls from falling than I could
completely discipline my mind.
I appreciate
the many messages of empowerment offered by authors and speakers today. I
really do. If we internalized only the constant negativity that is everywhere
today, we wouldn’t want to get out of bed in the morning. Yet, I am not always
able to immediately implement their suggestions.
Sandra
She is a friend
who had a more difficult childhood than 90% of us can even imagine. Her life
since then has been filled with trials, too. Therefore, keeping her thoughts
positive has been a never-ending challenge. She has given me permission to use
her unedited comments on deciding to
think constructively from a recent e-mail:
People are making this sounds like this is a “real
choice” issue; i.e., you and I can CHOOSE to drop everything we’re doing and go
skinny dipping! OR……CHOOSE to rack up debt on a credit card by shopping at the
most expensive places at the mall…..or CHOOSE to eat a whole thing of Chinese
food all by ourselves!
This isn’t very compassionate at all to those of us
who, through no fault of our own, have suffered deep depression.
You know, LIFE HAPPENS! We can’t be in a state of
ecstasy 24/7 for the rest of our lives! I mean, a “choice” to be joyful? Tell
that to the 9/11 families if they saw the planes flying into the WTC with their
loved ones trapped inside!
And we’re supposed to jump up and down and say, “WOO
HOO!”
The Prophet Elijah
He seems to
have suffered from depression. In I Kings, chapter 18, he wows a crowd of
hundreds, maybe thousands, when he defeats the priests of Baal. The power he
showed was truly amazing! However, by chapter 19, he is running and hiding in a
cave. He sees only negatives in the present and future, including his own
imminent death.
My Conclusion
An
optimistic mindset is absolutely crucial, especially in these times of
worldwide chaos and confusion. However, we should keep in mind that
constructive reflections are easier for some of us than others. You can tell discouraged
people that “It’s all inside your head.”, or, “Just let it go.”, but that’s not
the most supportive and effective reaction. Such a response may seem to diminish their very
real, complicated feelings.
For more on accepting people of different personalities, please
see my book, Accept No Trash Talk: Overcoming the Odds
How have you
been patient with people of different ways of reasoning?
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