Let’s face
it: worthwhile transformations may take weeks, months, years, even decades. Chronic
illness, job loss, automobile accidents, and the death of a loved one are only
a few examples of life-changing trials that require a huuuuuge adjustment.
We can think
positively all we want, but some circumstances just aren’t going to change
overnight. It’s unrealistic to expect immediate resolution in such cases.
Does that
mean that we should give up? No!!!! Anything worth having is worth fighting
for. We don’t want to cultivate completely unrealistic expectations. On the
other hand, we shouldn’t allow unfair situations to batter us back and forth
and dictate our mood.
My last article
was about overcoming negativity. A reader wisely noted that positive thinking won’t
immediately change our unwanted circumstances. I can’t argue with that.
Optimism isn’t going to chase away trauma. However, it can make the trauma more
bearable and help us to find an eventual solution to the trauma. I don’t
advocate giving up and letting pessimism flood our minds. Let’s see what three
people well acquainted with trauma have to say about positive thinking:
My husband
This wonderful man has a lifetime of
experience in pushing through poverty, family contention, health challenges,
and other disappointments.
Positivity is not about
immediate changes to your circumstances. It’s about changes in reactions to your circumstances.
If you
expect major changes right away, you’ll probably be disappointed.
You don’t
have to believe in the pie-in-the-sky attitude. You just have to reach for small victories. Don’t expect a pot of gold
at the end of every rainbow; celebrate the small steps to victory.
Big
change requires big effort.
Your
attitude affects everything, even your health. There’s plenty of evidence that
a negative attitude damages the immune system.
Never
give up or stop trying.
Me
Groundbreaking successes never come
easily. There are at
least two conditions for every accomplishment:
Don’t lose hope. Believe in a brighter future, or you won’t receive
it. Makes sense, right? Zecharaiah 9:12
states, “Return to your fortress, you prisoners of hope; even now I announce
that I will restore twice as much to you.” (NIV)
Be willing
to do as much work
as necessary.
Cultivate joy. While you’re struggling and reaching for that
significant breakthrough, engage in activities that give you joy. This may
uplift you in your darkest hours.
Ask
for, and accept, help when appropriate. This takes some of the burden off of you. For instance, my daughter
came across a stray cat in our neighborhood this week. The animal’s right
eyeball is completely missing, and it is severely malnourished. It figured out
where we live and followed my daughter home the other day. We gave it food and
water.
It is heart
breaking when this gentle creature slowly ambles up to me and starts purring
for attention. I want to pick it up and hold it. I also desire to keep
providing the cat with food and water, but it doesn’t stay in one place for
long. I cannot help this feline if I don’t know where it is, and if it doesn’t “ask”
for help.
Kelly
This friend has survived the death of
loved ones, family tragedy, health challenges, poverty, and divorce (three
times).
In fact, she went through three huge
trials within a four-month period:
- The death of her closest friend
- The near-fatal accident of a close relative
- The unwise, life-changing decision of a loved one
Talk,
write about, and envision things as you
want them to be, not as they are. For instance, she puts notes in
places of high visibility saying that certain relationships have been healed.
She reads these aloud at every chance.
You know
what? It works. She has seen partial victory in completely unexpected ways.
My Conclusion
Optimism is
a state of mind, not a state of circumstances. Enough said.
Related Posts
Have you trained your mind for
positivity or negativity?
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